Nov 8, 2005

An amazing comment!

While I don't typically publish readers comments as Posts on my blog, I received a comment yesterday that I felt truly deserved the honor.
The asterisk's text below was taken from what began as a counter-comment from one male reader to another- in response to my Post entitled "A JUST WORLD?" written on Oct 30th.
What follows is in essence a manifesto, an elaboration of one mans definition of the sacred oath of true manhood, as it relates to women and the world around him. Amazing stuff.

Now the irony here is that after reading the original reader's(misandrop's) contemptuous counter-comment to me, in the Men's News daily on a post regarding the VAWA bill (a comment that he was so proud of that he actually provided a hyper-link to it within the body of his comment left on the "Just world?" post!) I decided to delete his comment from my blog- something I typically dont do, with the decision based solely upon the ugliness of his comment to me in mnd--- A comment that was far less solicitous than the one left on my blog and lacked even a shred of feigned humanity or decency. Perhaps he was showing off as it were, for his cohorts at that publication- much like a child would do-either way, he went too far and showed himself there for what he truly is. as Mr Romero pointed out,and I also took note of of, this guys MO has all the earmarks of a potential abuser- right down to the poorly veiled attempts at taking the high road at the close of his bitter post, perhaps intent on trying to regain the appearance of magnanimity. You can decide for yourselves..
In any event, had I deleted his comment one day sooner, It wouldn't have been there for Mr Romero to read and respond to with such passion and eloquence. Once again the hands of fate were conspiring... Nuff said-Enjoy!

note: This comment has been edited for practical purposes, THE ORIGINAL can be found in its entirety, within the comments section of my post entitled "A Just World?" datestamp Oct 31


**Misanthrope.... suck it up and be a man, in the classical sense that nature cast us, as providers and protectors.
The genealogy of the human race as a social and cultural animal has been brought forward largely due to the role of woman-as the custodians of our progeny. While the men folk were traversing land and sea be it for hunting food or resource enrichment or standing watch, guarding the gate to beat back the encroaching horde, the women were charged with seeing to the cohesiveness of the social order centering around the rearing of the children, the lifeblood and very breath we need to ensure the survival of the unique species that we are.

I am a man and therefore stake as my right, the ability to comment on judgments formed, from a lifetime so far of experiences and observations I have culled on what it means to be a man and a man's role in our society.
A real man behaves himself. REGARDLESS should a man have the conscious bearing toward rude, distasteful, negligent or even criminal action, behavior as such is not justifiable. There's no excuse to slough those murky grounds and liability should be especially exacted if a man treads there with knowledge of this beforehand.

A real man is not a burden on his society. REGARDLESS where our casted lot has sorted us, the real man stands shoulder to shoulder with his fellows stoking the coal-fed fires in the engine room heat, with comraderie as our water ration.

A real man does not foist his dysfunctions, if befell by them and at their mercy, onto those weak, or not, around him. A real man realizes that should he lose the moral lodestone a man must be to his family then high has come the time that either he toils to regain it, with the help of others if need be, or suffer the consequences and remove himself from their presence, monetary support notwithstanding- the cognizant act of fathering children precludes a man from avoiding his financial support.

The bottom line is that as men we have not only a responsibility but a choice as well. Once we've made the choice along these lines, the mantle of new responsibilities enjoins; responsibilities that have been struck into the genetic make-up of our social fabric as I have outlined above.

If you. Misanthrope truly werea real man and you got screwed by the system so much so to be cast into your misanthropic mire, then I would stand by you my fellow, and bouy you up with a forearm grasp and then champion your cause by your side should a request by you be offered. As we all have felt the irony of the cosmos when bad things happen to good people.
Which is not you, Misanthrope. You are not a good man, or a real man for that matter, and any affiliation, I could ever imagine we would have would be a vigilant watch over you as a safeguard to those you may someday try to hurt. Reading between your lines I see a bitter small man coming through, who, out of an indignant ego and petty pride has chosen to bail your bile laden bilge onto the purifying glow of Ms. Chasing Normal, this woman who first was brutalized at the hands of some worthless piece of human detritus.
Surviving that, she was then subjected to victimization once again through the court system as only imagined from the countless Domestic Violence cases bargained out. Cases in these courts bargained out to the extent that crime as well as punishment have been watered down to nearly nothing at all.....nothing at all compared to the mountainous magnitude of pain, physical disability, trauma, and lifetime suffering and, as in many cases, violent death to follow.
Cases bargained out by feckless prosecutors and equally amoral defense attorneys most times cronies from the same bar association, making deals over cocktail lunches and who-knows-what-other-favor-swappings going on, all heard before a judge from, once again, the same bar.

It's attitudes like yours that find themselves into every aspect of our society. An attitude that when, midway thru another trial of so many cases, with the victim mustering every strength to face her cowardly and immoral and many times sociopathic attacker, a gunshot heard from somewhere on the street outside the courthouse, prompts the words "Sorry honey, we gotta go and catch us a real criminal, besides you don't look that bad any more, time has healed your face fine. Case Dismissed."

The real horror lies in that gunshot heard. Too often do we hear about the gunshot coming from "the estranged acquaintance" exacting his revenge -
Who of us will have the courage to protect and defend our women?

I, as a man am appalled and deeply troubled by this bellwether of our society. Besides the full weight of every ounce of intellect and moral fiber I have thrown to stand in support of VAWA and those working to rid our culture of the seething apathy toward domestic violence, I stand ready at the gate, with an eye on you, and your kind and a cell phone in hand dialing 911 to protect the women, children, and any of my fellow citizenry who might fall prey to you predators infused throughout our society. And if necessary I can root around the floor of my hall closet for my old Louisville Slugger.

Your type raises all kind of alarms for me. You dare air your connivances masquerading as intelligent discourse from a pity pulpit, on a page where someone is trying to rouse herself from the waking nightmare into which she was plunged, with intentions solely to right the wrongs visited on so many innocents. Ms. CN is threatening no one except the likes of you cowards who feel personally attacked by those seeking justice from the legal system, and a willing acknowledgement from society. To those who genuinely engage in trying to make this world a better place, I welcome Ms. Chasing Normal's blog and applaud her tenacity.

The public seems in a unified cry to rid the streets of thieves and drug dealers and criminals especially of the violent type. But where lies the difference that lets charlie punch clock or eddie the executive who comes home from work, smiling and waving to the neighbors, to walk scott-free when behind closed doors he beats his wife-or merely threatens her with violence. This is terrorism of the domestic kind.
Is this the ilk to which you belong??? misanthrope???

Possibly the "ex-parte" you have become enlightened of, was visited on you, probably as your ex was seeking to protect herself potential or further harm.
She wants you out? Then get out. Do something decent and exhibit some dignity. It's called "not making a bad situation any worse". Compared to the beatings, it's a lump no real man would complain about taking.

This would explain why you and your buddies over at the Men's News Daily have raised such hue in mounting baseless attacks defending your stance against the VAWA bill. Where do you get the cojones to claim after reading the Just world article, that the principles involved; i.e. victims, were so misguided to not see that the real victims were the likes of you. If I may reiterate to you my opening comment to you... Grow a set of balls. I'd be embarrassed to say, let alone post for the whole wide web to read, comments as you did, should one day occur I fall ill with fever and suffer permanent delirium.

With hubris you claim being helped to understand....because inconvenient facts are conveniently left out, blah, blah, blahÂ…..inane prattleÂ…... You claim as fact billions allocated to women's shelters' but nothing to abused men and children, although they comprise 50% or more of the victims abused. Site your sources to backup these ridiculous claims. Many women fleeing an abusive house take flight to shelters with their children.

Do yourself a favor big man, crawl out of that sensory depravation tank you call your life and volunteer at one of the many shelters IÂ’m sure to be found within your locale. What you will see there in one evening alone will change you forever. But I am remiss in making this suggestion for they would never let a scumbag like you have the address to on of these shelters, let alone allow you near one. While the policy line would be to protect them from you, when the lights go out,Â… you know that old strength in numbers thing.

The VAWA bill covers all domestic violence, men and women; And I know that renaming the bill Violence Against People Act would not be enough to prevent a malcontent such as you from spewing your hate-veiled- as-cogent- comment.

With all that said......

......while the world is full of creeps like you, and never is the occurrence I would dignify the tripe you've written with a response, it was the profile of the abuser you really are that leapt off the page at me as my eyes read across the last two paragraphs and your closing comments. In typical abuser form, once the verbal abuse and vilification complete, the abuser reverts to the soft pedal approach, with veiled words of feigned assurances, to lure his victim in again, should a guard go up and he starts to lose her.

You are sorry for her suffering??? You pray for her???? Kind regards???? You sicken me with your meaningless platitudes. Did you think you saw another damaged women you thought you could run your game on? Or perhaps you were trying to salvage from the scrap heap a few shreds of dignity in attempts to restore a sense of credibility among any other passing viewers? IÂ’m sure many, including Ms. CN, can see right through to what is seriously wrong with you. What worries me is there are many people out there unable to recognize you as the evil-entity with no redeeming value that you are- they that number as possible potential victims.

Whoa, whoa, whoa……. (And at this point I ‘ve just returned from your cross-link to Men’s News Daily and in stunned anger read your reply to Ms. O’Keefe’s heart-as-well-as-gut wrenching experience to which you mocked in your reply. And the class act that she seems to be called it as she saw it –an utter lack of human decency- and refused comment any further.
Which is not the case with me and my kind; us, the reemerging real men in this world. My friends and many co-workers stand all together on as this as a topic we share liberally and often with all the men we meet. More than reinforcing respect for the women in our lives, we stress the importance of remaining silent no longer if we hear, see or even suspect there is violence toward the people in our lives.

A no account piece a crap like you spouting twisted hate in some bar within the presence of myself or the men I know, would find himself vigorously persuaded to reconsider the next words he chose to speak. ItÂ’s a free world to think what you want but when you come out of corner bringing your demented discourse into the public forum, youÂ’ve become fair game. And if intelligent prodding convinces to no avail, then cheerfully I would invite you to step into alley behind the bar, so we may see how you hold up to having your head smashed repeatedly against a solid wall. And my defense?, why I would present as Exhibit A your illuminating alliteration.

A wise man you are keeping shielded your identity. You wouldn’t want to let to your friends and employer the misogynist you really are. Then known to all you would be the pariah you should be. I’m sure talking stupid goes over big with your inane horse scrota buddies at the Men’s News Daily. However, this, as well as your attempts to parley intelligentsia while “away from home”, reveal the insipid shallow child you are to be. For the future, reserve your drivel for your blog only so that we in the sphere can avoid it at all cost and snuff out your vile vitriol with determined disinterest.

In closing, misanthrope, on your knees you should fall and beg forgiveness to all mankind for your callous, rude and insensitive rant, as well as such misguided conviction.
While my voice I raise in praise for this brave soldier Laurel Makepeace OÂ’Keefe. She is woman for all intents and purposes who has not merely survived but emerged only stronger, despite horrific abuse and lingering suffering, while dispelling damage along the way. With intelligence accompanying as her hand maiden she has taken up as standard bearer with her voice speaking out the survivor's tone. ****

Posted by Manny Romero to Chasing Normal .. at 11/07/2005 10:51:25 AM

4 comments:

Cupcake said...

Hi Laurel-

I ran across your blog while perusing the blogsphere and I was awe-inspired by the comment from Mr Romero.

I hope you don't mind me posting a link to this post on my blog
http://cakemuse.blogspot.com

As a survivor of abuse this is something near to my heart. Thank you for allowing readers to see a real man's point of view.

sue said...

Hi! I just found you through your comment on B'Tude's blog. I thought maybe you'd be interested in my other blog, The Dark Madness. http://darkmad.blogspot.com

I'll be reading more of your site and catching up. Looks incredibly interesting.

Laurel Makepeace O'Keefe said...

Cupcake-I dont mind at all, I too find it awe inspiring, thats why I posted it on its own!
I'm going to find a way to post it on mens news daily, so that the cretin that left that first post- misandrope-will definetely read it, as he is a regular over there.
His comment on my blog was innocuous compared to the one he left at MND to me..
In any case, Im glad you read it, and any cross links to it, or my blog is fine. I just read some of your blogs and they're great-I too have been concerned that my blog become so "heavy"- I didnt start it with the theme of DV in mind, it just kind of evolved into it. If you look at the older posts they were a bit lighter fare.
I'm thinking about either starting a seperate one for "regular" life, or mixing things back up on chasing normal, we'll see..
Thanks and Take care of yourself,
L-

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